A Letter to Mom

October 26, 2019

Mom,

I'm writing to let you know that your father passed away at the end of August. Isaac and I drove down to Indiana for the funeral. (Shane and Allie stayed behind because she had daily tennis practices and a match or two.) It was wonderful to see everyone. Aunt Sharon was there from Idaho and stayed with Grandma for a few weeks. She is retired now an is considering a move to Arizona. Aunt Margo and Uncle Bob were there. Sasha, Wes and his wife, and Vanessa were there. Uncle Jim, Uncle John and Aunt Deb, Megan (who was expecting her 3rd baby at the time), Jonny and his wife and their little girl, Jack, Jarod and his fiancee (now wife) were also there. As was Uncle Rod and Aunt Betty. We missed you, Uncle Mike, Aunt Leslie, and Collin. Uncle Mike has been losing his vision and Aunt Leslie has dementia. Lots of friends were also there.
The funeral was at the beautifully restored Sweet Church. The bell was rung 95 times as the pallbearers carried the casket across the road to Sweet Cemetery. Grandad's resting place is in the far left corner -- right up against the corn fields. Very appropriate for someone who farmed til he was ninety. The VFW was there and presented their gun salute. My favorite part were the three sailors from the US Navy in their crisp white uniforms. They folded the flag that draped the coffin with precision and care. One of them presented it to Grandma with the words, "On behalf of the United States Navy and the President of the United States, we thank you...." I don't remember the words exactly. There was much sniffling as it was a very moving moment.
After the funeral, Grandma had a minor stroke, followed by another 2 weeks later. An MRI revealed early stages of Alzheimer's. It's my understanding that the stroke didn't have any lasting effects; however at 94 years of age, she is frail.
Shane and the kids and I are doing well. Isaac is enjoying his senior year by joining every orchestra around. He's quite good at the string bass and at music composition. We're looking at colleges.
Allie is enjoying her sophomore year. She enjoyed her 2nd year of junior varsity tennis and has her sights on making varsity next year. She loves tennis so much, she played it daily during the summer. She has the tan to prove it.
I work at a local middle school in special education and I enjoy it. It's rewarding work.
Shane works from home still and enjoys the work he does. He has our dog to keep him company. In February of 2018, we adopted a rescue dog. She's a yellow lab mix about 60 lbs and her name is Raelyn. We got her when she was a year and 3 months old. She was brought up to Wisconsin from Alabama with her one remaining puppy from a litter she just had. It would have been nice if we had been able to keep them together but we couldn't handle a puppy in winter with no one to potty train it except Shane who would be trying to get his own work done. Allie and I are especially fond of Raelyn. She sleeps on her bed at night and takes up quite a lot of space! We laugh about it.
Our kids are growing up and are very nearly grown. We're proud of the young adults they're becoming. They are kind, considerate, generous, polite, thoughtful, and so much more. You would be proud. I know you are. Perhaps one day you'll get to meet them. It is unfortunate that circumstances have not allowed that to happen. Please be patient. I know you don't understand. No doubt it's been painful for you. Please stop calling the police in my area. We are fine. We are not alcoholics. Your disorganized thinking is telling you that. I know it's not your fault. Schizophrenia is a terrible disease that has cost you so much. If only you were aware of how much you stood to lose when you stopped taking your anti-psychotic meds in the late 1990's. Oh well. What's done is done.
I'm happy to send you occasional letters on how we're doing and what we're up to as long as you stop trying to convince people that my children belong with you. Not gonna happen, Mom. When they are adults, they can choose whether or not to meet you. You're just going to have to wait.
Until then, focus on the good things in your life. Be kind to others. Make new friends. Be the kind of person that you want your grandchildren to look up to. Take care of yourself.

Love,

Cindy

My Constipated Brain and Big Kid Underpants

Sometimes as I experience life, I imagine I'm narrating a novel and I think, this (or that) would make a good blog post.  Now, as I sit down in front of my blog, all the thoughts I had are all crammed into a knot in my constipated brain.  What the heck happened??  lol.

As I mentioned on Facebook tonight, I took the kids to WalMart.  After we got home, I had the kids go into separate areas to try on their new underwear over their current pair.  They looked huge when I took the undies out of the packages and we had our doubts, but...  Suddenly I hear Isaac laughing (which is a normal occurrence for that dear boy) and he comes out and they fit!!  Allie's fit too!!  We all laughed together and couldn't believe how much they've grown over the school year.

I don't know where today went, but since it didn't really start until 10:30am...  I finished mowing the front lawn where I had to stop last night because I ran over Allie's glasses.  In between a couple of long breaks I mowed the back yard, which I consider to be huge.  Shane, with his long strides, can get it done in probably half an hour where it takes me all afternoon.  (I wish he were still here!) Then I washed towels and sheets -- especially important after our recent stomach viruses -- be gone, germs, wherever you hide!

Allie is having a farewell/slumber party on Tuesday with 5 or 6 of her friends.  She is obsessing over every detail.  I talked her down from planning every single minute of the party and explained how perfectionism can set us up for disappointment.  For example, what if the other girls don't want to watch the movie she picked out?  She'll be devastated if she doesn't know when to let go and go with the flow.  I've seen it before:  she plans everything so carefully and is crushed when things don't go according to plan.  I don't want for my dear daughter to hurt like that.  After all, who can control everything?  Only God can.

A Fun Couple of Days!

There was no school in our district for the past two days, and we couldn't've asked for better weather. After the rain ended yesterday morning, I took the kids (Isaac, Allison, and Brock) to Kids' Crossing, a park with a huge wooden playstructure that the kids can run around in. Since other area schools were in session, we practically had the place to ourselves!

Today we went to garage sales in beautiful Mt. Horeb in the morning and had lunch at a McDonald's with an outdoor playplace. Brock had a moment of personal triumph when he overcame his fear and crossed the suspension bridge. Isaac helped Brock go halfway across and then he went the rest of the way by himself. Another time, he climbed high up and was freaked out about climbing back down. I was really proud of Allison for using encouraging words to help him down little by little. I was really proud of all of them. Having all three kids together added a fun dynamic. Both boys get to play alone with Allison often but not with each other as much. It was a lot of fun.

Here are some pictures. For some strange reason, blogger put them in reverse order and I don't have time to rearrange them. To view them in chronological order, start with the bottom photo and go up. Enjoy! :)

Cindy's 37th Birthday

My 37th birthday was this past Sunday. It was a blessing to hear from so many of my friends on Facebook who sent their birthday wishes. Isaac and Allison brought my presents to my bedside in the morning while Shane and I were attempting to sleep in. :) Allison got me a princess tiara and Isaac got me some toy capsules that dissolve into spongy insects in warm water (dontcha love it? :) and Shane and kids together got me a lovely snow globe with a verse on it about a mother's love. It was very sweet. We ate brunch and later on had birthday cake and ate an early supper at Taco Bell and then went to church at 4:30pm. After the kids were in bed we watched an old Frank Capra/Jimmy Stewart movie, "You Can't Take it With You." I've always wanted to see it. It was good.

Is it really Tuesday today? This week is already going by so fast! Our school system has no school on Thursday and Friday this week and temps are supposed to be in the mid-to-upper 70's both days. Ahhhh... I can feel the sun's warmth already! I can't wait to soak it in! I was cold today, so this afternoon I decided to warm up my favorite way -- by taking a bath. Allie was playing games on the computer and I told her where I was and that if she needed me to come and knock on my bathroom door. No sooner did I sit in the perfectly warm and relaxing tub than she starting wailing. I'm like, what in the world is going on? I called out to her and she wouldn't answer me. I got out and opened the door a crack and asked her again, and she said that the internet wasn't working. I reminded her that she's supposed to come get me and use her words, not sit there and cry! I got her to calm down, come to my room and watch tv on my bed until I finished washing. So much for soaking!

Judging from my last post, I forgot to update you all on my sinus problem. My ENT says I have Rhinitis, an inflammation of the nasal passages. I'm to rinse my sinuses twice a day and continue taking Nasonex. I still feel like I have a cold all time. Poo. He also said I can't have inner ear surgery until year after the hole in my eardrum heals. No big deal there. I know I'm missing some sounds but I can hear enough to get by, for now.

I just wrote a long letter to a long-lost high school friend, so I'm ready to take a break from the computer and sit in front of the tv with my husband. (If you're reading this, hellloooo, Lori Recker!!!)

Later!

Isaac's strep, Allie's glasses, Our date

Hi family and friends! Just a quick update today -- it's long overdue, I've been meaning to do it, but I'm feeling weird and it's almost time to put supper in the oven. A couple of hours ago, my head started pounding loudly in my ears. This usually happens when I get a fever, but I don't have one, although I feel like I am fighting something. Hopefully, it's not what Isaac has.

Isaac is home with strep throat today. I'm so glad I took him in to the doctor! I had no idea -- I thought it was just a virus because his fever was only 100. I was surprised when the nurse called me back with the results of his strep test that were positive. He didn't act a bit sick at the doctor's office. He was happy and energetic. This morning, before I gave him pain medicine, he was almost in tears because his throat hurt so bad. It's amazing the difference a little Ibuprofen makes in a sick child. It's always good to see your child back to being themselves.

Allison is getting glasses. Our school district recommends vision screenings for incoming Kindergarteners, which is a good thing for this family! Isaac got his glasses at 5 1/2, the same as Allison. Both kids are farsighted. Last week she picked out the frames and we're now waiting for them to come in. She picked out pink frames -- they're a subtle metallic rosy pink which looks lovely with her blue eyes and blonde hair. I can hardly wait to take her picture and post it on here so you all can see what see looks like.

Shane and I went out for dinner last Friday. Allie's preschool, which is in a church, offered babysitting in the preschool room to raise money for a trip for the Junior High youth group. The kids had a great time. Shane and I went to Tony Roma's, which is known for their ribs. We didn't order any. I had steak, baked potato, and steamed broccoli; Shane had a shrimp pasta dish. One of the kitchen staff brought out our meal and assumed that I had ordered the pasta and Shane had ordered the steak. We got a chuckle out of that. Shane said, "Actually, I ordered the shrimp and pasta, and no, I'm not gay!" I just rolled my eyes at his joke. After we picked up the kids, we came home and watched our favorite TV show, "Psych" and played The Settlers of the Catan with our friends Wesley and Kimberly. I really enjoy our Friday nights in general, and it was really special to go out to dinner as a couple.

We have very little snow on the ground at the moment, but that's supposed to change come Tuesday night. Rain will turn to snow overnight and on Wednesday the total accumulation is expected to be 6 to 8 inches. No doubt the kids will be excited to have snow to play in again!

A Morning of Thankfulness and Praise!

I'm having a great morning. School was cancelled again today due to freezing temps and I am at home with my two lovely children. Isaac just left to go on a playdate with his friend D.J. Allie is singing loudly in the bathtub and playing with her tub toys.

As for me, I am praising God because my ears are finally opening up. I've been trying unsuccessfully to pop my ears for weeks, when suddenly I heard a click when I swallowed and I thought, "This could be it. Now would be a good time to try to pop my ears." I tried it and I heard a rapid succession of popping that sounded like fireworks. I knew right away it had worked because I suddenly became aware that the music in my room was unbearably loud. This is only my right ear, mind you. But I'll take what I can get. In the meantime, I'll keep believing that the left ear will open soon, too. Praise the Lord! - which is exactly what I did when my ear opened up. I was listening to praise music by Phillips, Craig, and Dean (PCD) and boy, did the lyrics ever speak to me:

"Like an ocean breeze blowing on your face

like a summer sun with it's warm embrace

like a gentle rain plays a symphony

that's what I want my praise to be.

Like a fragrant rose in the early Spring,

like an eagle soars when it spreads its wings

Whatever, Lord, you may need from me

That's what I want my praise to be."

I love how the lyrics in this song captivate my senses. Having one of them restored to me filled my heart with thankfullness and praise. Thank you, Lord! May your name be praised!

Halloween 2008

Allison was a kitty cat and Isaac was a Power Ranger again for Halloween. (Click on the pictures for a larger view.) We went trick-or-treating with our friends and neighbors, the Krauses, the Fishers, and the McFarlanes. It was fun going as a group this year. Shane stayed home and handed out candy and enjoyed interacting with all the kids and commenting on their costumes. Shane and I will glad when the candy is all gone, as Isaac asks for it nearly every day! Not to mention that we get into their pumpkins after they've gone to bed. Not very healthy! :)

More Success for Allie!!

I'm so proud of Allie. She's been dry for over 24 hours. I was a little nervous last night when we went to a friend's house for supper where Allie wore underwear with no plastic pants over it. (They were all in the laundry - yikes!) I brought along a pad for her to sit on but there was no need. She really seems to be getting the hang of it. Last night she stayed dry and went pee on the potty first thing in the morning -- that's a huge turning point in potty training. I'm excited to see if she can do it again tonight. If not, tomorrow's a new day and we're not going to give up.

My main concern right now is helping her to feel comfortable with going #2 in the toilet. I'm not sure how. But once we pass that hurdle, the rubber pants will come off and she'll be one step closer to earning the ballerina Barbie that's sitting on top of the fridge still in the box.

I'm proud of Isaac, also. He's been very encouraging to Allie during her time of learning to stay dry and being in the spotlight. He had a hard time with it at first, though. A couple of weeks ago he said, "What about me? I use the potty all the time! Why don't you tell me 'good job' when I go?" I told him I was proud of him, too and that we're learning new things all the time and we all need encouragement. Now he just beams at her and gives her a big hug.

Happy Belated First Weekend of Summer!

It's not much as far as videos go, but I thought it would be fun to tape the kids playing together in the pool last Friday afternoon.

Friday was a busy day. At 8am we went to Allison's swim class, then we spent a couple of hours at the zoo, had lunch with Daddy at the office, watched a Scooby-Doo video to unwind, then splashed in our backyard kiddie pool (see above pictures and video), then played on the Fisher's slip 'n slide (next three pictures).

Saturday was also a full day. We spent it at the Griffin's house, or rather in their backyard. Shane was there to help with their basement remodeling and the kids and I were there to hang out with Melissa and her kiddos as well as a few other friends, old and new. It was great to see them again. It had been awhile.

Sunday, Shane spent the day in Milwaukee with three friends and saw a Brewer game. The kids and I went down to Janesville to see the Shrine Circus. It was ok. The best part was seeing Isaac take his first pony ride. Allie was going to ride on one too but got cold feet at the last second.

I'm still exhausted from our busy but fun weekend. I miss those afternoon naps we used to take together when they were younger!!

The kids want to go outside again, so I'll close for now. I'll probably take more pictures today and post them later. I'm so glad it's finally summer. We're having so much fun outside!

A Saturday morning

I took the kids downtown again last Saturday for the Farmer's Market around the capitol square. I do enjoy taking the kids places where they can learn more about the places that are outside of our neighborhood. We did the typical walk around the square with the mass of other people who were at the market as well. I never feel more like a salmon than when I am at the Farmer's Market -- even more than when on the highway during rush hour.

After our traditional walk around the square, the kids always want to go up to the balcony of the capitol building. It is open to the public and goes completely around the capitol dome, so you can see a lot of downtown and the lakes in all directions. At the time, it was everything Allison wanted in the world just to go up to the balcony. When we got there, she took one look over the edge and wanted to leave. :( I held her the entire time and of course never went near the railing.

As it was approaching noon, we made our way back down the capitol building for some lunch. A quick stop at the drinking fountain outside the capitol building gave Isaac some time to do a little show-boating for the public.

So... with lunch in our tummies, cookies and cheese curds in hand, we headed out to one of their favorite parks where there just happened to be a carnival going on, and boy, do our kids love carnivals. They enjoyed their cookies at the park and the many things to do there without pressing too much to ride the carnival rides. After a very busy morning and afternoon, we headed home where I was hoping we'd all enjoy nice long naps, but oh no.. not our kids. Silly kids. Don't they know I'm old?

Severe Weather

It's been an interesting day weatherwise here in Southern Wisconsin. This morning it was sunny, hot, and extremely windy. After lunch, the kids went outside to run through the sprinkler with their friends. We went in when the skies turned dark and soon it began to rain. A HUGE bunch of thunderstorm cells went through to the north of us and spawned a bunch of tornadoes, but all we got was the rain. As I watched the weather man on tv, I counted four different tornadoes in our area. There was one near the Wisconsin Dells, which is about an hour north of us, one northwest of us, one east of us, and one southeast of us. Two of them were in our county. Apparently, there were lots of different cells that produced these rotating thunderstorms and they were scattered. But like I said, we didn't see much action here. All we got was rain. So far, anyway. More storms are forecasted for tonight and tomorrow and the next day, and the day after that, and so on. Isaac and I like tracking thunderstorms. We've been reading library books about weather and it's been really interesting!

This afternoon during the rain, the kids and I watched Monsters, Inc. Laughing with them, I realized how much I enjoy them. It was just one of those random moments in everyday life when I looked at my kids and felt so happy. Being their mommy brings me so much joy.

Sick kids

Isaac's been sick with a cold virus since Monday afternoon. As soon as he got home from school, I could tell he had a fever. It was 102.9. Over the last few days it's been 100, 99, 101, 103, 100, then 98.6 at the doctor's office, then back up to 102 by lunchtime. I kept him home Tuesday, Wednesday, today, and he'll be staying home tomorrow too. He'll need to be fever-free for 24 hours before he can go back to school. I took him to the doctor today and she said it was just a virus. He's also had a cough but his lungs are clear and his throat looks fine.

Allie's also had a virus but it has showed different symptoms in her. Her fever has only gotten as high as 100.3. Most of the time it's been in the 99 range. She developed a light rash all over her trunk and a stye on her upper left eyelid. The doctor said that once the rash appears she's no longer contagious. Her cough sounds like Isaac's cough, and her lungs are clear too.

With the kids being sick this week, I've been missing out on babysitting income. I'm not too disappointed, as it's been fun having Isaac home -- cuddling together on the couch, napping together, playing a board game or two.

It's just a matter of waiting it out, drinking lots of fluids, and keeping Isaac from over-exerting himself. Incidentally, he over-exerted himself tonight and got sick to his stomach. He hasn't shown any signs of stomach upset other than that. But he's been tired a lot. Yesterday after lunch he told me he was tired so he went to bed and slept for 2 or 3 hours. I couldn't believe he put himself to bed without complaint.

Hopefully, my kiddos will be back to health in the next day or two. If not, back to the doctor we'll go.

Madison Expected To Break Record As More Snow Comes

"MADISON, Wis. -- Madison is expected to have a new winter snowfall record by Tuesday morning. The Madison area is only one-half inch short of the seasonal mark of 76.1 inches set during the winter of 1978 and 1979. There's 4 to 6 inches of new snow anticipated because of an upper level disturbance crossing the state on Monday night."

Ugh! I'm trying to keep a postive attitude but this much snow is just craaazyyy!!! It hasn't even been a full week since our last storm, which dropped a whopping 18 inches. This isn't Wisconsin, this is SIBERIA! You know it's a bad winter when the sidewalks have walls. :) It'll be interesting to see just how high those walls get. I'm pretty sure we'll be borrowing our neighbor's snowblower tomorrow morning!

Isaac will be happy if there's a snow day tomorrow but Allie would be sad to miss preschool as it only meets two days a week.

About the pics I'm posting -- they were taken less than a week ago after the 18 or so inches we got. The ones during daylight show our friend and neighbor Greg sitting in a lawnchair wearing shorts and drinking a diet Coke while the neighborhood kids wait for the bus the morning after the snowstorm. I guess he's ready for summer, too.

Think Spring, think Spring, think Spring... I think I'll go stamp some cards with flowers on them. I'll post them when I'm done.

School Pictures

We finally got Allison's preschool portraits today. Here it is, alongside Isaac's Kindergarten portrait. My two precious babies...my, how they're growing! Click on the picture for a larger image.

Happy Halloween!

Isaac and Allie enjoyed Trick-or-Treating tonight for an hour and a half! Most houses had lights on in our family-friendly neighborhood. A third of the way through, Allie's bag started dragging on the ground from the weight. Then she wanted me to carry it for her. Gotta go put them to bed. Wish us luck!

First Day of School

Here they are....the much anticipated first day of school pics! Allie looks as happy as a clam in her photo with her teacher, Ms. Katie. Isaac's photos show him getting off the school bus. One of the first things he told me was, "I'm tired." He sure looks it. Both kids had a good first day of school. Isaac especially liked riding the bus home with his friends C.J., Megan, Emma, Chloe, and Ethan who are all close neighbors. (You may click on the photos for a larger version.)

Note Allie's haircut: I cut it myself. Good thing her hair is curly, 'cause it ain't perfectly straight across the back. I love the ringlets on both sides of her face! She wasn't too keen on sitting still long enough for a haircut so she sat on Shane's lap facing him. While he distracted her with his charm and wit, I worked as quickly as I dared. I even gave her long layers. Not bad, eh? Maybe I should look into Cosmetology as a profession when I return to the work force in a couple of years... I would think that cutting an adult's hair would be way easier and less frustrating.

It sure does feel good to have the kids in school, although it's strange having Isaac gone all day ('til 3:30pm). The last couple of weeks before school, they drove me nuts with their fighting and rough-housing. They really needed to be out of the house and away from me, home, and each other and into a more structured environment. The kids are growing and learning so much and so excited about school that it makes my heart well up in my chest. Gosh, I'm proud of them.

Oh, I forgot to mention... Some of my friends asked me if I cried on Isaac's first day of kindergarten. In case you were wondering, I didn't. I knew I wouldn't because I had such a strong feeling that he was ready. What's more, he knew he was ready and was looking forward to the adventure. It just "felt right." Like when I got married, I wasn't nervous because it just felt right. There's something so beautful about a rite of passage when you're ready for it. What a blessing!! (Besides, I already cried last semester when Isaac rode the bus for the first time to Early Childhood.) Still, it is strange to think about your kindergartner eating lunch without you, playing without you, finding his way to bus number 5 without you. I remind myself that there are teachers and helpers everywhere in his school and they're especially looking out for the kindergartners.